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  • K. Shaun

Dear Future Me... "See Me. See Me?"

Updated: May 31, 2023

Dear Future Me,

I’m so nervous! Why did they pick me to make this stupid speech? Okay. Breathe. “D. I won’t do drugs. A! Won’t have an Attitude! R! I will respect myself.” Dang it. Why did I have to look around the room? My mother is sitting there with those tired bags under her eyes mouthing the words.

Oh yeah. “E! I will educate me!” The crowd was standing and clapping, so I think they liked it. I’m just going to grab this paper and walk off the stage. I can’t even focus on what old buddy is saying because I keep looking at the door waiting for him to walk through. He promised me this morning, that he would be here. He promised. He wouldn’t break it. Not this time.

The only thing left is the awards, I know he won’t miss that. “Hey mom, can we take dad a piece of cake?” Her expression was blank and quiet. She didn’t pick up the cake. I grabbed a napkin and put a couple cookies in it. I know dad will want something sweet when I see him.

The ride home was quiet. The cookies burning a hole in my pocket. The stories that I’ll get to share with my kid one day. To grow up and be just like my dad. So big and strong. Always at home. My mother is always at work. She never even goes outside with me. My dad does. He’ll sit on the porch with his friends, while I play with mine. My hero.

As soon as the car stopped, I was hopping out. “Hey dad! I got you something.” There he was sitting on the couch playing the game. Of course! I knew he would never miss my speech if it wasn’t important. He has almost beat the whole game. That’s so cool. He even lets me play sometimes!

“After you clean up. You can go outside. I need to take a little nap, I haven’t been sleep yet.” She barely even looked at me before giving orders. Always do this. Do that! I can’t wait til me and my dad move out! Just the boys. No girls allowed!

“You don’t have to clean up right now. Just chill.” I don’t know when I went to sleep, but my Dad was sleep too! Best buds! I can hear my mama fussing. I just want her to be nice sometimes. I pretend to be sleep again. I think Dad did too! Great minds think alike.

I put a blanket on my Dad when it was safe. I turned off the game. I looked at the table and he ate one of the cookies. I knew he’d like them! He may not have seen my speech. He may not make all his promises. But he always seems to make me happy. If I keep being great, he’ll make it one day!

A son will always look up to his dad. And that’s okay. But you have a mother too. One day you’ll be a Dad. And when that day comes. You’ll know exactly what to do? Even if it looks a little different now. Appreciate that ONE that you tend to overlook. She loves you. She just had to do the work of two!


A Hopeful Son

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